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Story for Monday, January 17, 2000
"Make a Wish, Mommy"
by Susan Fahncke
Sometimes Life's greatest lessons are the ones we would never be able to learn without difficult circumstances leading us there.
It was my 28th birthday, and I was depressed. Divorced, raising two children alone, and too poor to even afford a telephone, I was going through the most dark and depressing time in my life. I hadn't lived in Utah very long, and was still trying to adjust to the snow, and this particular January was one of the most brutal in years.
The snow outside was literally thigh-high, and it was a daily struggle to leave the house, adding to my isolation. My son Nicholas was in Kindergarten, and I was a Junior at nearby Weber State University. I had taken the quarter off because my five month-old, Maya, had been very ill, so I had little social interaction. It was a winter of loneliness for me, but also of incredible closeness with my children. My small son, with his enormous child-sized heart taught me the greatest lesson.
The day before my birthday, I was a grouch. I was used to celebrating it with the friends I had moved away from. I was used to presents and phone calls, none of which I would be receiving this time. Feeling sorry for myself was becoming comfortable for me. Depression became so second-nature that I didn't even remember the happy, laughing person I used to be. I was so wrapped up in my own problems that I couldn't even see that the greatest joys, blessings and sources of laughter that I would ever know were right there in front of me.
Tucking the children into bed that night, I was in a cloud of hopelessness. My little Nick, wrapping his chubby six-year old arms around my neck and said "Tomorrow's your birthday, Mommy! I can't wait!" His blue eyes sparkled with an anticipation that mystified me.
Kissing his sweet rosy cheeks, I hoped that he didn't expect a birthday party to magically appear, like it does on his birthday. Life is so simple when you're six.
The next morning, I awoke before the children, and began making breakfast. Hearing noises in our tiny living room, I assumed Nick was up, and waited for him to come in to eat. Then I could hear Nick talking to Maya. He was sternly telling her to make Mommy smile today.
It suddenly hit me. Being so wrapped up in my misery, I didn't see how it affected my children. Even my little boy sensed I wasn't happy, and was doing his best to do something about it. Tears of shame at my selfishness washed down my face. I knelt down in our little kitchen and asked for the strength to somehow find happiness again. I asked God to show me some beauty in my life. I asked Him to help me see, really see the blessings I did have.
Putting a smile on my face, I marched myself into the living room to hug my children. There sat Nick on the floor, Maya on her blanket next to him, and in front of them was a pile of presents. A birthday party for three.
I looked at the pile of presents. Then my eyes went disbelieving, back to my son. His face was gleeful at my shock. "I surprised you, Mommy, didn't I? Happy Birthday!" He grinned his toothless, adorable grin.
Stunned, I knelt down next to him and with tears in my eyes, I asked him how in the world he had possibly found a way to get me presents. He reminded me of our trip to "All A Dollar". I suddenly remembered him telling me he was spending the allowance he had been saving for ages. I had laughed at his bulging pockets and remembered thinking that he walked like John Wayne, his pants loaded down with his life savings. I had almost chided him for spending everything he had so carefully saved, but thought better of it, and did my shopping while he did his.
Looking again at the beautiful pile of presents in front of me, I couldn't believe that my small, darling son had spent everything he had in his crayon bank on ME. On his mom. What kind of kid goes without the toys he wanted so that he could buy his MOM a pile of presents? There. I heard the voice in my heart. I am showing you your blessings. How could you ever doubt them? My prayers were being answered. No one was more blessed, and no one had more to be thankful for than I did. I had been so selfish and petty to feel unhappy with my life.
With tears flowing, I gently hugged my son and daughter and told them how lucky I was. At Nick's eager prompting, I carefully opened each present. A bracelet. A necklace. Another bracelet. Nail polish. Another bracelet. My favorite candy bars. Another bracelet. The thoughtful gifts, each wrapped in gift bags and wrapping paper purchased with a six-year old's allowance were the most perfect I've ever received. The final gift was his personal favorite. A wax birthday cake with the words "I love you" painted in fake frosting across the top.
"You have to have a birthday cake, Mom." My oh-so wise little one informed me.
"It's the most beautiful cake I've ever seen" I told him. And it was. He then sang to me, "Happy Birthday" in his sweet little-boy voice that melted my heart and brought on more tears. "Make a wish, Mommy" he insisted.
I looked into my little boy's shining blue eyes and couldn't think of a single thing I wished for. "I already got my wish." I whispered through the tears. "I have you."
Susan Fahncke
The Letter Box:
Dear Susan,
I just wanted to tell you that I agree with your reasons for breaking your rule in regards to previously published items. It is a valuable lesson learned when we can offer someone a second chance. God Bless You and your work.
-Jane/Brooklyn,NY
Dear 2TheHeart,
I had to write and thank you for putting forth such a fantastic service! There are many similar ones to choose from, but none of them even come close to the integrity and uniqueness of 2TheHeart! Every daily email is a gift - thank you!
-Mitch Simmons, stationed in Saudi Arabia
Dear Susan,
What a great start to my day! 2TheHeart's stories always put a smile on my face and make me realize how blessed my life is. Your writers are the best I've read! I love your idea of "Funny Friday", and your Monday column is always my favorite.
Thank you,
-Cheryl Kramer, Phoenix AZ
Dear Susan,
2TheHeart is not only full of talented writers and top-notch stories, your kindness is matched by none! Congratulations on such a terrific publication!
-David Wiloughsby, London England
